This Blog Is For Women

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When entering into a relationship with another person, it’s important to keep in mind that they are half of the equation.  And only half. Loving the other person is vital to a good relationship, but it is not enough.

Though it might sound selfish if you’ve not considered this before, the most important person to love in a relationship is yourself. Doesn’t your mate deserve to love someone who loves themselves? Why should they love you if you do not even love yourself?

Loving yourself doesn’t mean only thinking of yourself.  Loving yourself doesn’t mean leaving the other person out of the equation.

Loving yourself means many, many things – all of them necessary for a healthy relationship and all of them necessary to bring you through the ups and downs of life .

Here are a few ways that you can practice loving yourself: Read the rest of this entry →

The Way of the Superior Man is the title of a book written by David Deida.  The subtitle is “A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire.”

I read this book several years ago.  I’m not really sure how I found it in my hands, but I do know that I read it when I was trying to understand men better.  I’m a woman, and I think that every man should read this book and take something from it.  And I think women can benefit from reading it as well. Have you read it?

There’s a lot going on in today’s “enlightened” world.  Women are more than ever, taking charge of their lives and Men are, more than ever, faced with having equal partners in relationships.  The struggle for many of us then becomes how to find the Yin to each other’s Yang.  This book sheds some light on ways to do this.

As I read the book, I recognized many things that had gone wrong in my marital relationship: little things, ways of thinking, small understandings. I wished that I had found the book a decade or two earlier.  From time to time I re-read it to remind myself of the power of being feminine and the strength of being masculine.  These two states of being can be embodied by the same person, but not at the same time.

It is powerful reading.  I’d love to discuss this book with you.

Here’s a quote from the preface:

Live completely.  Know your deepest purpose.  Give the gift you were born to give.  Enjoy sex as a cosmic portal into love’s wonders.  Serve your friends so they may grow.

These words speak to how we should all live our lives.  But each sentence of this quote is a huge challenge.

•  ”Live completely.”  This one makes me think of all the tedium that gets in the way of my being able to live completely.  Truly living, for me, is not accomplished by vacuuming the house, or paying the bills.  But somehow these must be done to allow a life without chaos.
• “Know your deepest purpose.”  Wow.  Just Wow.  Do you know your deepest purpose?
• “Give the gift you were born to give.”  We were all born with a gift to give, take some time to think about this.
•  ”Enjoy sex as a cosmic portal into love’s wonders.” That is what it is meant to be, right?  Do we surrender to it?  How?
•  ”Serve your friends so they may grow.” Wouldn’t we all be better people if we followed this example.  Serving our friends so that they may grow and they serving us in return.   A world like this one would be a very fulfilling place.

Opening your mind to a book like this is like seeing the world with new vision.  I urge you to grab a copy at your soonest opportunity.  It could change your life.

One of the biggest reasons why I had a strong relationship with my parents — and still do — is because I always knew I could talk to them about anything.  – still can.

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Can you remember those times when you knew you did something you shouldn’t have, and it would have helped to talk to someone about it, or at least confess to relieve your conscience? If you could just talk about it you could get a few hours sleep that night instead of laying awake for hours worrying.  Maybe you don’t have that sort of disposition, but when I was a kid I did.

When you’re a kid, telling a grown-up that you’ve done something wrong can be a recipe for punishment.    I mean, that’s their job right?   I had friends whose parents yelled a lot, and grounded them for the slightest infraction.  If I’d had that type of parent I would have grown up keeping a lot of things to myself.

Lucky for me my Mom had this rule:  If I didn’t want her to get mad about something “terrible” I needed to tell her I only had to do one thing.  A really simple thing. Read the rest of this entry →